Thursday, October 25, 2012

hocus pocus

Yesterday started off with me being so sore from my workout the day before, that it was hard to get out of bed, so i spent most of the day fighting a headache and my insanely sore muscles. I just did random things around the house most of the day, and feeling in a generally weird mood. And then I thought of something that would make me feel better.

Hocus Pocus. Obviously.

I love Halloween. Kyle said to me a week or so ago, "I have been with you for a long time and I still don't get your fascination with Halloween." Whatever, Kyle.

I always think of Hocus Pocus during this time of year, because it was one of those movies that I would watch over and over and it was always funny, and as I watched it last night, as a 24 year old, there were things that made me laugh even harder now because I actually understand them.

(as the townspeople are trying to break down their door)
Winifred (Bette Midler): Don't get your knickers in a twist! We're just three kindly old spinster ladies.
Mary (Kathy Najimy): Spending a quiet evening at home.

It's really all very creepy. I mean, they're sucking the life out of children! But I would still sing their weird children-luring song all through October.

"Come little children / I'll take thee away / Into a land of enchantment. / Come little children / the time's come to play / Here in my garden of magic." 

How effing creepy is that?! 

Throughout the entire movie, everyone consistently reminds poor Max that he's a virgin and that he lit that damn black flame candle and brought back those crazy Sanderson Sisters, when all he wanted to do was impress that hottie Allison and possibly touch her "yabbos." I'm willing to bet the being a virgin part made it all way worse. And Max's little sister, Dani, is 8 years old and usually the one reminding him and everyone else that he's a virgin. Does she even know what that means?!

Winifred: You know, I've always wanted a child. And now I think I'll have one…ON TOAST!

At one point, the witches are chasing the kids as they drive a car (how old are they?!) and Winifred flies up next to the car on a broom. She says, "Pull over! Let me see your driver's permit!" 

I find this really funny because she is supposed to be from 1693.  The sisters didn't know what a blacktop road was, didn't understand the concept of trick-or-treating and were afraid of the city bus that pulled up beside them, but somehow Winifred knows that Max needs a driver's permit. huh?

Growing up, I think we probably wore out our VHS tape we had of it, just like we did with Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and it started to play all warped and weird after so many times in the VCR. Watching it last night made me think of my siblings and being piled up on the couch with them in our pajamas and thinking about our costumes and who will get the most candy.

Obviously I don't really dress up anymore. Kyle doesn't like it really and we never actually have a party to go to, so we just eat candy and take pictures of Brady and my cousins in their costumes and carve pumpkins. But I always enjoy this time of year. It's the one day of the year (unless you're an actor or a con-artist) you get to be someone else...a PowerRanger, a Hunger Games tribute, Harry can be anything. That childhood love of dressing up will probably always be with me, and I'll probably always want to watch Hocus Pocus.

Get with the program, Kyle. Halloween is freaking great.



  1. This is one of my faves too, and I wouldn't wait for October to watch it and sing along with SJP to the song. I watched it on ABC Family the other night, because I mean, what else should a 26 year old be doing at 10 o'clock at night, right?
    Anyway I had the SAME thought about the driver's permit thing. I was like, um, you were flabbergasted by a cassette player, Midler. I don't buy this!
    I wish ABS Family would play this every night for 13 nights of Halloween!

    1. I totally agree! I mean, why in the world wouldn't it be included in the 13 nights of Halloween? It's obviously one of the best movies ever. Also, I felt the same way about myself watching it last night. I thought "I'm 24. I'm getting married. I have a degree. And I'm watching a Halloween movie from 1993." lol Totally perfect night if you asked me! :)